Friday, 8 June 2012


I felt like doing something nice.

All i could see was coffee, so i ran with that.

"Yo you want some coffee?"

"Nah dog i'm good"


I look around,
there's a couple Puerto Rican dudes
playing dominoes..

"Noh fankyhu ma n****r"

I hear voices next door..

I ask dude number 1..

"Nah i'm good"

I ask dude number 2..



He has a facial expression that is somewhere between
confusion and utter disgust..

"What the fuck is the matter with you!? The man just offered you some coffee!!"

He just stares at me for a few moments,
the guy is bald, pale, looks very malnourished and is
frantically trying to decipher my motives for offering
him An cup of coffee..


At this point i knew things were going to get complicated,
annoying, yet it was too late to back out..

"How do you like it?"

"However you make it. I don't care."


"No, how do YOU like it? I make a big cup of coffee, with two and a half spoons of coffee,
three and a half spoons of creamer and five packs of sweetener"

"Whatever, just make it how you make it"


I go back next door an make two big cups of coffee,
even putting in a couple mints to make sure it's nice.

Reluctantly i pick em up an shuffle next door..

He looks horrified.


He makes a gesture to an empty cup around two centimetres tall..



I calmly explain that i told him well in advance how i was going to make it,
but he's just not listening.

According to him i am in the wrong, so for my sake i leave..

As i stand, far away, cooling down, a freind approaches..

"You ok Timmy?"

"...yeh, yeh i'm fine.."

We start talking but out of nowhere i feel a rush of negative
energy approaching..

It's him again.

He's holding the cup of coffee.

His eyebrows are arched diagonally inwards.

Before he opens his mouth,
i take in a deep breath..


He stops a couple feet in front of me,
holds one hand up asif he's swearing allegiance to something,
an look at the mug in his hand..

"Tim..This cawffee.."


"This is the WORST fokin' cawfee i've ever tasted in my LIFE bro! Whot the fok is the MATTER with you!?"


I close me eyes..

My hands are shaking..

I bow my head..

My eyes are now open as i stare at the floor
for a few seconds trying to compose myself..

My freind puts his hand on my shoulder..

As i look up i can't help but notice the big black rings around
this mans eyes.

He isn't that much older than me but his face
tells a very different story, littered with tiny wrinkles
and red cracks.

We work out sometimes.

Other than that we don't really talk,
everything always has to turn into an argument,
everyone else is always wrong, he's always right,
it's exhausting getting into minor conversations
as you know how it's going to end..

I walk away..

"YO! It's only fokin' cawfee bro, what the FUCK!"

As i enter my current sleeping chambers i get a shock.

Out of view,
crouched around the corner of the room,
there's a 260 pound 7ft tall black man wearing pair of pants,
clutching a radio, with a very childlike expression on his face..

"I'm hiding"


I don't even question why.

I'm tired.

"yo dog, bust open a bag'a them plantain joints! I know you got em'!"

"errr..HOW do you know 'i got em'?!"

A big, highly infectuously cheesy grin engulfs his big face..

"Cos' i saw em in your locker!"


"C'mon dog! Bust 'em open!"


Why not..



"YO! They're already open!? What the FUCK!?"

"..i got hungry while i was hidin'.."

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